Find Out Who Your Are. And Then Do It On Purpose

A reflection on the Women in Leadership panel – and why authenticity still isn’t as free as it should be.

I’ve been working in the flexible workspace industry for over 26 years. And if you’d asked most people in that room last week whether they’d heard of me through those first twenty, the honest answer would have been no. Not because I haven’t been working hard – I have. But for most of those years, I kept my head down, got on with the job.

Personal branding wasn’t a phrase anyone used back then. Networking felt like something other, more confident people did. I was just… quietly getting on with it. Invisible, in the best possible way I thought – until I realised that invisible wasn’t working for me anymore.

A few years ago something shifted. Maybe it was age. Maybe it was just finally deciding it was time. But I pulled on my cowboy boots – literally – and walked into a networking event. I felt widely out of place. So I held onto a Dolly Parton quote that had stuck with me.

“Find out who you are. And then do it on purpose.”

What a sentence. I stopped trying to show up as a polished, corporate version of myself. I showed up as me – country music lover, horse obsession, cowgirl vibe and all. And people remembered me. Not for a perfectly crafted elevator pitch. For being real.

That’s the story I shared on the Black Country Chamber of Commerce, Women in Leadership panel last week, alongside the brilliant Sophie Wardell and Lucy Rook, facilitated by Jessica Shields. And what happened in that room afterwards is what I actually want to talk about.

The Conversation That Matters

After the panel, women came to speak to us. Not to network in the traditional sense, to exchange cards or talk about what they do. They came to share their own stories. Stories of shrinking themselves in meetings. Of having an idea dismissed, hiding pregnancy for as long as possible. Of being told – implicitly or explicitly – that their personality was “a lot”. Of learning, over years, to sand down their edges just to be taken seriously.

What struck me was these weren’t women who lacked confidence. They were smart, capable, experienced professionals. But they were still fighting – in 2026 – to be heard without having to perform a version of themselves that felt safe enough for that room.

That’s not a small thing. That’s a fundamental problem that we haven’t solved yet.

Women in the workplace are still navigating environments where having a voice can feel like a risk. Where being direct is labelled aggressive. Where showing emotion is seen as weakness. Where stepping into your own power fully, unapologetically can come at a professional cost.

And the result? Women self-edit. They second-guess. They tone it down. They show up as a version of themselves that’s easier to digest and they do it so automatically they sometimes don’t even notice they’re doing it.

What Needs To Change

Events like this matter because they create space for those conversations. But events aren’t enough on their own.

What needs to change is the environment women are returning to on Monday morning. The cultures that reward conformity over authenticity. The leadership that mistakes quietness for professionalism. The workplaces that say they value diversity while making it uncomfortable to actually be different.

Authenticity shouldn’t be a brave act. It should just be… normal. The standard. The expectation.

The feedback I got after the panel, that the cowgirl vibes created permission for others to own their own thing, whatever their thing is – that meant more to me than anything. Because that’s the point. It’s not about cowboy boots. It’s about giving yourself and other people full license to just be who they actually are.

The Invitation

Whether you’re a business owner, a team leader, or somewhere in the middle of figuring it all out, ask yourself what you’re toning down. What you’re hiding. What version of yourself you’re leaving at the door.

Then think about what it would mean to bring that in with you instead.

Find out who you are. And then do it on purpose.

Jeni Sellick is Operations Manager at West Midlands House, a flexible workspace and coworking centre in Willenhall, West Midlands.